March 26, 2020

A Healthier Mindset for Social Media (Part 2)

Edie Melson    @EdieMelson

Social Media Director for Southern Writers Suite T

My worth is not determined by my numbers.

For me, the blog posts that mean the most are rarely the ones that generate the highest numbers. The ones that mean the most are those that help someone, that connect the dots for an individual who’s hurting or help someone who’s frustrated finally see the light. It’s when I pen those words that I feel true satisfaction in my calling.

So how do I avoid the numbers race? I’ve come up with a few things to keep me on track.

  • I quit talking about myself on social media—completely. Instead I work hard to help someone else succeed or reach a new level. This takes my focus off me.
  • I volunteer. I offer to write an article or blog post for someone who doesn’t have the same size audience as me.
  • I issue an invitation. I ask someone who doesn’t have as much experience and/or exposure to contribute to my blog. 
  • I watch the clock. I limit my time on social media to a strict thirty minutes a day. With that, I don’t have time to obsess over my numbers.
  • I reveal something new about myself. I know this seems like the opposite of the first bullet, but it's not. I'm talking about being vulnerable, not saying come look at me. I've discovered that I make those important heart-to-heart connections when I open up and I'm vulnerable. When I revert to slick slogans and polished posts, I'm just hiding.

Even when I follow my own advice, there are times when the people I’ve invested in move on. They may stop following me on social media and/or unsubscribe from my blog. How do I deal with the disappointment that inevitably follows?

  • I remember it’s not about me. My first thought is always to wonder what I’ve done wrong. Truthfully, I can only think of a few instances when it’s really been something I did. On the few times when I’ve contacted someone to ask why they’ve moved on, I’ve learned that their focus has changed.
  • I remind myself that we all have limited time. Perhaps the person leaving is reprioritizing, and for that I’m glad. We’re all trying to do too much. I applaud anyone taking steps to get control of life.
  • Finally, I take time to pray for the person who left. I ask God to bless them and to let me know if there’s anything I need to readjust.

Social media is an important part of our toolbox as twenty-first century wordsmiths, but it’s not the focus of what we do. It’s so easy to get caught up in the race to the highest numbers and forget why we’re doing it. This media driven world we live in ebbs and flows. One second we’re on top, the next at the bottom of the pile. When we measure our worth through charts and graphs generated by numbers, we’re certain to fail. But when we look at the lives that are impacted by our words, success is guaranteed.


A Healthier Mindset for Social Media @EdieMelson @southernwritersmag

Edie Melson is the author of numerous books, including the bestseller Connections: Social Media and Networking Techniques for Writers.

She’s the co-director of the Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writers Conference, Social Media Director of Southern Writers Magazine and board Member of the Advanced Writers and Speaker Association.

Visit Edie on and through social media.

1 comment:

  1. Thank you Edie. I am always in amazement how much you do to help others. As busy as you are you always make time when you are needed.

    I agree about the social media-talking about self.

    I have noticed in the last few years it has gotten so much better. It is wonderful when an author talks about another author's book, praising it and recommending it. There is a saying, (don't remember who first said it) If you help enough people get what they want, you will get what you want.)

    You are right, it gets our focus off us and puts it on others.