By Sheri Wren Haymore
We entered the foyer of a favorite restaurant
one busy weekend evening just as the manager burst out of the kitchen through a
side door. There was sweat at his temples, sauce spilled down his chef’s
jacket, and a certain wild-eyed expression on his face. Upon recognizing us, he
threw a nod in our direction, exclaimed, “Livin’ the dream, Baby; livin’ the
dream,” and kept right on rolling toward the dining room.
I totally got it.
And I recognized that wild-eyed expression
because I’ve caught my reflection in the mirror and seen it on my own face.
It’s the look you get when you’re working your buns off, and it’s still not
enough. It’s a gaze of frantic desperation coupled with a sideways glance of
anticipation and a blink of satisfaction.
It’s the way you look when you’re living your
dream.
Just last year, with two novels recently
published and a full calendar of book marketing adventures, I’m pretty sure I
carried that expression everywhere I went. I was having a ball living the
almost-famous life, filling the role of celebrity speaker for writing groups,
writing the occasional magazine article—and all the while keeping my end of our
small business running. On a regular basis, someone would approach me and ask,
“When are you going to write another book? I can’t wait to read the next one!”
And over and over, I’d say, “I would if I had the time.”
Actually, I was having too much fun Livin’ the
Dream to get back to the dirty work of being an
author. Finally, I took a
three-day writing retreat in late August and got a great start on that next
novel. And then Life happened.
You know what I mean by Life, don’t you? Grand
adventures, as well as a few misadventures, right? Joyful occasions, and a
string of not-so-joyous ones. Since August, I’ve waved my ninety-year-old mother
off on her first motorcycle ride and buried a brother-in-law. I’ve played for
hours on end with our funny little dog, and prayed for hours over a hurting
loved one. I’ve stood at a graveside with parents whose child was gone too
soon, and literally gotten in the floor and wept with a friend whose child had
broken her heart.
Sometimes Life is just too much, and too often,
it looks nothing like The Dream.
And so it was this winter that I found myself
overwhelmed by the weight of other folks’ burdens and mired in trifling
distractions. I felt stagnant; I had no desire to finish my third novel. I
deserve to be carefree! I’ve already proven that I can write. I don’t
want to go down that vortex of late nights and preoccupied days again. Or
so I told myself.
But The Dream just won’t shut up. A few days
ago, I spotted a friend of a friend whom I’d only met once before. When I
called her name, she spun around, pointed her finger at me, and barked, “You
need to make a movie! And why aren’t you home writing another book?”
People sure can make Livin’ the Dream sound
easy.
Can you relate? No matter what Livin’ the Dream
looks like for you, there comes a time when, disheartened, you ask yourself, What’s
the point?
My friend Melanie says that it’s essential to
get at the heart of your desire. In other words, you really MUST ask, “What’s
the point?” My inner dialogue today has gone something like this:
Why did you want to be an author in the first
place? Because I’m good at it. And
what else? Because I have stories to tell. Why does that
matter? Because the world needs good stories. Anything else? Because
it makes me happy. And what else? When I write, I feel
Heaven’s smile.
Aahh, yes! No matter how difficult it can be,
when you’re Livin’ the Dream, it’s worth it all, isn’t it?
Today, remind
yourself exactly why it is that you do what you do. Meanwhile, I’ll be rolling
my sleeves up and getting down and dirty with that third novel.
_______________________________________________________________________
Sheri Wren Haymore is
the author of two novels so far, A Higher Voice and A Deeper Cut. Sheri
grew up in Mt. Airy, NC, and still lives thereabouts with her husband and a pup
named Cercie. Together, they've made a living running a couple of small
business, and made a life doing the things they enjoy--traveling, hiking,
camping, kayaking. Sheri loves music and yoga, inventing gourmet meals from
random ingredients, laughing with friends, and most especially spending time
with her daughter. A graduate of High Point University, she has burned more
pages than most people will ever write, and is currently scribbling a third
novel, which may or may not survive the flames. My social media links
are http://www.sheriwrenhaymore.com/
http://www.facebook.com/sheriwrenhaymore http://www.twitter.com/sheriwrenauthor (@sheriwrenauthor)
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